Two households, one child, and a working relationship you still have to build.

Two people who are no longer partners still have to run a coordinated attachment system for their child.

The custody agreement settles the schedule; it doesn't settle how you actually work together. Your child's sense of safety now stretches across two homes, and it depends on the two of you being predictable, consistent, and low-conflict at the handoffs — for years. That's a real relationship to build, distinct from the marriage that ended and from the legal terms already decided. It rarely comes naturally, especially right after a separation.

This isn't about revisiting the terms — it's about co-regulating a child's world across two households.

The work here isn't renegotiating who gets which weekend. It's building the communication and trust that let your child move between homes without carrying the tension between them. When co-parents can be steady and coordinated, kids adjust far better — and the parents spend far less of their lives braced for the next conflict.

I start wherever things are, and build toward as much time in the room together as you can tolerate.

My model isn't standard both-in-the-room couples therapy from day one. When it's still raw — when being in the same room feels like a lot — I often begin with each parent individually, so the harder feelings have somewhere to land first. But the goal is always to move toward working together: the more you can tolerate being in the room, the more the parenting relationship can actually shift. I set that pace by what's workable, bringing you together around your child, non-romantically, as soon as it's doable.

What is co-parenting counseling? It's relational support for two separated parents learning to work together as a reliable team for their child — building communication and trust, not renegotiating the custody terms.

Do both parents have to be in the room together? Not always at first. When things are still tender, I often start with each parent separately — but the aim is to bring you together as much as you can tolerate, because that's where the parenting relationship actually changes. We move toward joint work at whatever pace is workable.

How is this different from custody mediation? Mediation settles the legal terms; co-parenting counseling is about the ongoing relationship after those terms exist — the day-to-day communication and trust that a legal agreement can't create.

How is this different from parenting coordination? A parenting coordinator is usually a neutral, often court-appointed role with authority to make or recommend decisions when parents can't agree. This is different: it's voluntary therapeutic work — I don't take sides, I don't decide anything for you, and I'm not part of any court process. My job is to help the two of you build the relationship, not to rule on your disputes.

Do we already need to be on good terms for this to work? No — most parents come in precisely because it's still hard. What matters more than how you're getting along right now is that you both want to do right by your child. We start wherever you are and build the working relationship from there.